I’ve been on the other side of this. And not as an unsupportive partner that doesn’t understand how depression works, but as an understanding partner who also has a mental illness trying desperately to be patient but really, really needing to have sex, ideally with the person I loved who I committed to a monogamous relationship with. This is an awful situation all around.
Depression seems to be about extremes — some people lose their sexual appetite, some people have it amplified, some people don’t get sleep and some people sleep too much. (TOO MUCH INFORMATION WARNING:) My sexual appetite was amped up, and unfortunately glued to my depression: sex became the only way I could feel something except the depression, and it became the only way I could recognize love. It was as you say, awful when the other person just didn’t need it: I felt rejected on many levels, many of which were artificial because of the depression.
This is where relationship counseling helps a lot of people. I tend to get into unhealthy relationships because of c-ptsd along with bipolar, and the sexual issues that come with my depressions seem to reflect the core issues from my history of childhood abuse. They’re like the canary in the coal mine. So I wonder how that is for other people…
Yeah, now that everything else is stable for me, the therapist is saying this is the best possible time for marriage counseling. Can’t do it while one partner is at bottom, but do it before this happens again or happens to the other partner.
“It’s not a statement”
Ouch, right in the feels.
I wont even attempt a r’ship at this point. Dont wanna inflict my toxin on another person.
I’ve been on the other side of this. And not as an unsupportive partner that doesn’t understand how depression works, but as an understanding partner who also has a mental illness trying desperately to be patient but really, really needing to have sex, ideally with the person I loved who I committed to a monogamous relationship with. This is an awful situation all around.
Depression seems to be about extremes — some people lose their sexual appetite, some people have it amplified, some people don’t get sleep and some people sleep too much. (TOO MUCH INFORMATION WARNING:) My sexual appetite was amped up, and unfortunately glued to my depression: sex became the only way I could feel something except the depression, and it became the only way I could recognize love. It was as you say, awful when the other person just didn’t need it: I felt rejected on many levels, many of which were artificial because of the depression.
Sympathetic until the last panel
This is where relationship counseling helps a lot of people. I tend to get into unhealthy relationships because of c-ptsd along with bipolar, and the sexual issues that come with my depressions seem to reflect the core issues from my history of childhood abuse. They’re like the canary in the coal mine. So I wonder how that is for other people…
I’m really glad you’re bringing this up, Clay.
Yeah, now that everything else is stable for me, the therapist is saying this is the best possible time for marriage counseling. Can’t do it while one partner is at bottom, but do it before this happens again or happens to the other partner.