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Story/Art © 2017 Clay

251 "Before & After"

Recurring Characters

Published August 15, 2015 45 Comments

depcom.252.col.400px

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Comments

  1. Keith GottschalkKeith Gottschalk says

    August 15, 2015 at 2:47 am

    Oh that hits close to home – second marriage “you’ll NEVER be happy!!”

    2
    Reply
  2. Jenny FieldsJenny Fields says

    August 15, 2015 at 2:48 am

    Yeah. I’m where I’m weary of anyone who expresses strong emotions before they’ve been with me through a spell. The rejections in the middle of spells make it so much worse.

    1
    Reply
    • Forget Talking TherapyForget Talking Therapy says

      August 15, 2015 at 8:30 am

      Yes! :p

      Reply
  3. Jessica HornJessica Horn says

    August 15, 2015 at 3:04 am

    So sad 🙁 you don’t want to be a burden to other people, they say it’s no problem, in the end it always turns out to be.

    2
    Reply
    • Nathan RubricNathan Rubric says

      August 15, 2015 at 5:58 am

      Unfortunately yes. 🙁

      1
      Reply
  4. Lesley NewmanLesley Newman says

    August 15, 2015 at 3:36 am

    Every. Freakin. Time

    Reply
    • Nathan RubricNathan Rubric says

      August 15, 2015 at 5:58 am

      *hugs*

      Reply
    • Forget Talking TherapyForget Talking Therapy says

      August 15, 2015 at 8:30 am

      Agreed :p

      Reply
  5. Michael FurieMichael Furie says

    August 15, 2015 at 3:45 am

    I’m so worried that this will happen that I’m afraid I’m going to make it happen. ):

    Reply
    • Forget Talking TherapyForget Talking Therapy says

      August 15, 2015 at 8:30 am

      +1 Awesome comment :/

      Reply
  6. Anonymous says

    August 15, 2015 at 3:56 am

    Oh yes, one of my turns. It always feels like this to me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6blOUl5WWVI

    Reply
  7. Agarax says

    August 15, 2015 at 4:24 am

    ‘Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens,’ said Gimli.
    ‘Maybe,’ said Elrond, ‘but let him not vow to walk in the dark, who has not seen the nightfall.’
    ‘Yet sworn word may strengthen quaking heart,’ said Gimli.
    ‘Or break it,’ said Elrond.

    from The Lord of the Rings
    by J.R.R. Tolkien

    3
    Reply
  8. Melissa FordMelissa Ford says

    August 15, 2015 at 6:38 am

    on the flip side, I’ve been left because I was getting well. suddenly I’m not a big mess and I have my own interests and now you’re just “not feeling it” anymore? okay, bye felicia.

    Reply
  9. Julia DavisJulia Davis says

    August 15, 2015 at 8:13 am

    Ouch. That hit close to home.

    Reply
  10. Forget Talking TherapyForget Talking Therapy says

    August 15, 2015 at 8:30 am

    such great comments everyone :/

    Reply
  11. egranina says

    August 15, 2015 at 5:41 pm

    Been there this May. The worst thing is trust issues afterwards, by the way: it becomes very difficult to trust yourself (your perception of people, your ability to see the cues) and others (their trustworthiness), e.g. spoils the future.
    If anyone knows what to do about fear of trust, let me know, please.

    Reply
    • clay says

      August 15, 2015 at 8:13 pm

      Unfortunately, life tends to justify my trust issues more than naught … I hope you find a way before you end up practically friendless like myself.

      Reply
      • egranina says

        August 15, 2015 at 8:47 pm

        Oh. Thank you.

        Reply
      • egranina says

        November 10, 2015 at 7:16 am

        You were so right.

        Reply
        • clay says

          November 10, 2015 at 7:19 am

          I hate to ask what was right;; what happened?

          Reply
          • egranina says

            November 10, 2015 at 7:23 am

            About trust. Life does justify trust issues.
            I wish we’d live in a better world.

            Reply
            • clay says

              November 10, 2015 at 8:15 am

              I’m sorry to hear that. I don’t know if it’s because people who have illness tend to wear their heart on their sleeve more, are more sensitive to trust issues, or tend to give their trust to people or situations more undeserving of it, but I think we are magnets for trust issues. Some people and situations you can’t trust but we tend to trust them anyways. I hope things get better and remember you have a friend in me if you need one.

              Reply
              • egranina says

                November 10, 2015 at 8:49 am

                Thank you, you have a friend in me as well.
                I’ve noticed that too. It’s as if I can’t fully grasp the idea that a person in front of me would actually lie to me, although such a concept in literature/cinema/history/politics is fully comprehandable. It’s just something that shouldn’t happen in real life to me. Although, why not? If it happens to other people, it might happen to me as well. In theory.
                But then in reality I’m standing in front of a man and cannot admit that he’s lying to me. The doubt just doesn’t cross the mind despite all the clues.

                Reply
                • clay says

                  November 10, 2015 at 1:27 pm

                  That’s an interesting observation and I think there’s something there, in that maybe depression clouds our ability to read other people as well as we should and thus we make poorer decisions of who to trust. I have been in a few relationships where my friends have warned me against pursuing, and I did anyways, and their warnings rang true. I honestly should have known better but I didn’t.
                  I don’t know if this applies to you, but you made me think of my past relationships and I think there is a theme in there of being blind to hints of untrustworthiness.

                  Reply
                  • egranina says

                    November 10, 2015 at 7:02 pm

                    Yes, very similar to my experience. Except for I’m usually encouraged to get into relationship, but that might be a gender thing.
                    I think people like us have a need to believe. It’s like a hope that helps to survive.

                    Reply
                    • clay says

                      November 10, 2015 at 9:36 pm

                      I think there is a gender bias that tends to look over men’s faults as “just being one of the boys” “sowing his oats” or “just needs a good woman”. It’s all bullshit. I’m sorry you are going through this. You deserve better, and being alone is better than being with someone you can’t trust definitely.

    • egranina says

      November 10, 2015 at 7:15 am

      You were so right.

      Reply
  12. Mic says

    August 15, 2015 at 8:43 pm

    This is one of many constant fears I’m living in 🙁

    Reply
  13. borasanuk says

    August 17, 2015 at 10:14 am

    Hey, I just found depcom.
    Just wanted to say thank you for providing content I can relate to.

    Reply
  14. @ArchivistBecks says

    August 17, 2015 at 3:25 pm

    TW: Depression. At least hubby isn’t like this. Too bad the rest are:
    http://t.co/cjXcOZ39eK

    Reply
  15. Brandon says

    August 18, 2015 at 2:01 pm

    This is why I prefer to stay away. If I’m going to fall, I’ll fall alone.

    Reply
  16. greencoffin says

    August 20, 2015 at 1:13 am

    There’s also the ‘opposite’ of this…when someone says they just need a friend, and it turns into “You’re not allowed to have a life outside of supporting me, I want to base my entire life around you.” And then they bring up their depression, so if you feel like a piece of shit if you don’t do everything they want, even though you really don’t want to do anything they do–while they keep pushing it as ‘friendship.’

    Reply
  17. @mbvln says

    August 20, 2015 at 1:59 am

    http://t.co/kxDxmzUAiw

    Reply
  18. Patrick Schuster-WileyPatrick Schuster-Wiley says

    September 4, 2015 at 4:39 am

    🙁

    Reply
    • Pepper NikitaPepper Nikita says

      September 8, 2015 at 9:28 am

      I second that ?!

      Reply
  19. rin says

    November 15, 2015 at 9:58 pm

    Oh no… I’m in the beginning of a relationship and it’s in the “before” stage. I’m so scared that this is going to happen.

    Reply
  20. Andrew says

    December 9, 2015 at 10:20 am

    …truthfully, I’m tempted to ask my wife to leave me. She doesn’t deserve having to put up with this.

    Reply
  21. sparkyspark142640606 says

    February 17, 2016 at 4:29 pm

    Almost started crying reading this one… it is why I truly believe I should stay single and not bother anyone
    ok update, crying.

    Reply
    • clay says

      February 17, 2016 at 5:47 pm

      It’s the catch twenty two… When you’re depressed it’s unhealthy to be alone but there’s a lot of damage when you’re with people.

      Reply
  22. That sucks. says

    February 24, 2016 at 12:36 pm

    Oh, hi my failed first marriage.

    Reply
  23. Tim KannardTim Kannard says

    February 26, 2016 at 1:02 am

    *hugs*

    Reply
  24. Mady MartinMady Martin says

    August 29, 2016 at 3:51 am

    Michael Duong fears.

    Reply
  25. I feel this says

    September 13, 2016 at 6:20 am

    This is what I’m constantly afraid of in my relationship. He gives me no reason to feel that way, but I can’t imagine anyone wanting to stay with a person like me, who is always unhappy/have no energy and whose whole life revolves around my illness. Being with an unhappy person must make you unhappy as well, right? Sometimes I think I’m unconsciously trying to sabotage our relationship because I just know he’ll get tired of me eventually and it’s better if it’s now rather than years down the road.

    Reply
  26. MaahHeim says

    November 8, 2016 at 1:41 am

    Yesssss!

    Reply
  27. jackmarten says

    April 23, 2018 at 1:07 am

    another reason to remain single forever … thanks!

    Reply

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